September 19, 2020

Doctor Reacts to: ABSURD MEDICAL MEMES EP. 5

– Who's ready for MedicalMeme review episode 5? (upbeat music) When your family asks you how schools? (laughing) This dog is adorable.

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First of all nobody wants to hear it.

They ask you being polite.

But then if you start tellingthem about your anatomy lab, your O.

N.

T lab, your boards are coming up.

People are just like (snoring).

“Doctoror, Can you show mewhere the pain is coming from? “Me: shows a text that hasbeen seen with no reply.

” If I'm struggling in a relationship.

I would just show a text from my ex and I'd be like (makes noise) sadness.

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” It is probably better that doctor strange became a superhero, “because his steriletechnique is cringe-worthy.

” – Oh, I'm excited for this.

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(Strange.

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) – Oh did he touch hisface mask after washing? Dr.

Strange, that is a no no.

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“Some girl in my college came to the chemistrylab wearing flip-flops.

” “The instructor made her do this.

” – Always use protection folks and I'm not talking about condoms.

Well, I am talking about condoms, but I'm also talking about your feet if you spill hydrochloric acid, you will burn your foot.

your feets.

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Do not burn your feets.

“When you cannot mentallytake in any more information, so you physically (laughng).

” “Doctor: I've got some bad news.

” “Me: laid on me gently.

” “Doctor: Okay.

Knock knock” “Me:Who's there? – (laughing) Herpes.

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Here's the deal with herpes.

You shouldn't try and get it.

But if you get it's notthe end of the world.

A lot of people think herpes is some sort of deadly illness But the huge majority of the time.

It has no bearing on your life.

Outside of some discomfort, or physical symptoms, or a rash popping up.

“When surgery turns up the jam in the O.

R” (drum solo playing) – Yo, surgery room gets lit “$50 to walk in the door” “prescribes green teawith lemon and honey.

” (laughing) – I just paid a copay for youto tell me to drink honey? My grandma told me I can have honey.

What did you go to school for? I just saved you unnecessary antibiotics.

That had you have taken unnecessarily for your viral illness.

You would have beendeveloped diarrhea down here, possibly a rash up here, possibly anaphylaxis in here.

wWhich means your throat closes and you end up.

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“Putting on gloves, “alone” :In front of other doctors” – When you're alone yourpalms aren't sweating.

When you walk into the surgery room, the O.

R , as a new student and youhaven't been there a lot.

Your palms just start spraying sweat like it's sprinkler fluid.

Sprinkler fluid? I remember when I was a resident.

I was nervous doing a procedure and I was putting on hisgloves in front of a patient.

It look like it was my firsttime putting on the gloves.

The patient was probably like “Dude, this guy still don't know how to put on gloves.

” * “I'm not getting sickduring my Peds rotation.

” (cat sneezing) I remember I'm on my ownPeds in the hospital.

And I'm doing my roundsand I'm all cheery.

And I'm like, “okay little baby say ah.

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” And just as they say “ah”.

The baby goes.

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(spit sound) right into my mouth.

I tasted the baby's saliva and they had Coxsackie.

It's a virus.

(ugh) – “Dr.

His palms are sweaty, ” “knees weak arms are heavy.

” “There's vomit on his sweater already.

” Did you just quote Eminem? Ma'am, your husband'salcohol problems not a joke.

– On the surface.

He looks calm and ready to drop bombs, but he keeps on forgetting what he wrote down the whole.

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okay.

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(laughing) – (inaudiable talking) – Oh, yeah didn't James Charles.

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Yo James Charles gotdemonetized for some craziness.

For singing like “womp womp womp.

” Yo, Em, please.

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we have a lot in common.

I'm from Russia.

You're from Detroit.

I'm white.

You're white.

You rap.

I don't.

Don't demonetized me bruh.

(laughing) – “when you're attendinggives incorrect instructions, but you really want aletter of recommendation.

” – You have to figure out a way to tell them that youdon't think it's right or what you read is wrong.

– “Trying to learn a newskill in medicine like:” (inaudiable) (laughing) – “Open up please.

” “Me: Sometimes I get sad.

” (laughing) – That's really funny.

I like this one.

This one makes me happy.

I don't know why.

But yeah, it's okay to get sad.

You only appreciate the sunrise when you see the sunset.

– “Me: I think I have cancer”Doctor: It's all in your head.

(sigh of relief) “A bunch of all in your head.

– Yeah, that's a meme.

– “Your patient drinks, ” “smokes, ” “consume 6 cups of coffee daily” “has diabetes, ” “high cholesterol, ” “BMI40, BP 160 over 110” “doesn't adhere to his meds.

” “But in takes a daily multivitamin.

” “Why are you still alive?” – I don't know if any ofyou have ever heard of 'House of God'.

It's a great book.

Samuel Shem it always talks about the unhealthiest people living the longest.

It feels like they never croak.

Their blood pressure is poorly controlled.

They're overweight.

They don't take theirmedications appropriately.

But then they're like “oh but I take my Flintstones daily vitamin.

” – “When you scrub in for the first time” “and walk up to theoperating table like.

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” “I'm not sure what to do with my hands.

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” – Honestly it's true, because you have to keepyour hands like this, or like this, or like this, because you can't drop them too low because that area is not sterile.

You can't put them on your face because that's not sterile.

So you have to like keepeverything like this.

And if you sneeze.

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you have to sneeze forward.

The worst thing that you can do is turn to the side and sneeze.

Because at all this sneeze stuff all this sneeze stuff.

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all the sneeze particles comes out onto the patient fromthe side of your mask.

– “Texas: 14 year oldvirgin Falls pregnant” “after flu shot.

” ” Hell no” “Why myself or my kids willnever get the flu shot.

” “One of the many reasons” – What? – Unless you're dating a guy and you've nicknamed him flu shot ain't no way a flu shot's getting you pregnant baby boo.

– “Nurse: You may not feelanything from the waist down.

“Him: Just (bleep) then” (laughing) – What? I would have rated this meme as “you may not feel anythingfrom the waist down and I want to say as “him want to bet?” – “You are the mother(beep).

” “You, are great!” “You are magnificent!” “You can do whatever youwant to do in this world.

” “Get yo mother(bleep) shine on today!” “Because you can't.

” – I'm officially changingmy alarm clock into that.

Because we all need a littleinspiration the morning.

This isn't just for healthcare work.

– “Many top scientistson the autism spectrum.

” “So technically autism causes vaccine.

” (laughing) – What movie is this from with the rock? This looks old school.

But yeah.

No, it doesn't – “Mike, Carbs are bad for you.

Also Mike eats their Kinder Eggs.

– Dude, keto for 30 days with no carbs, no sugar was tough.

So when I finish Keto and Iget a package of Kinder Eggs , you best bet I'm gonna go in.

– “So do you like touch my balls first?” “Or how does this work/” “Steven I'm your dentist?” (laughing) – Hold on a second.

This picture is not accurate.

Why is he has a stethoscope doctor? – “Doctor: It's okay.

Yourwife's in a better place.

” “Heaven?” “My Apartment.

” – “When the parents refuse all vaccines” “and the newborn screening” “because they're all natural, ” “but then the man is circumcision.

” (laughing) – I love this guy's meme face.

I don't know what's beengoing on with circumcision lately being in the news.

Everyone's talking about it.

There's a huge uproar.

There are health benefitsto getting a circumcision.

There are health risks togetting a circumcision.

The health benefits arepretty few and far between.

But if some people for religious reasons want to get one and thereare some health benefits.

We do do them.

Let's make a circumcision video.

No, wait, that sounds bad.

Let's make a videodiscussing circumcision.

– “I pass this every day, ” “and it always seems likesomeone caught in a lie.

” “Where do you work?” “Oh the medical building?” “Oh, what's the address?” “1 2 3 4 5 geez? What do you do there?” “It's the surgery.

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center.

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(laughs) – I didn't even see the”12345″.

That's crazy.

– “Sure.

You're a doctor.

“Then how do you explainall your free time?” – That's a question I can relate to.

Making YouTube videos, going on television.

I mean Ryan Seacrestthe other day was like, “are you a real Doctor?” Michael Strahan's like, “are you a real doctor?” – Yes, I'm a real doctor.

Board certified family physician here.

Sup' yo.

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– “Other student: howare rotations going?” “what I say 'living the dream'.

” (laughing) “what would mean” – “Dr.

Any drugs?Patients in the E.

R: Nope (laughs) – I'll have young folks come in and they look like they justcame from a rave concert from Ultra Coachellaburning man, whatever it is.

And they're like, “I don't feel good Doc” and I'm like, “well tell me what'sbeen going on would you?” – “Oh, I just came back from this concert' “We were raving all weekend.

” – Well, “did you do any drugs?” – “No.

” – Did you drink any alcohol no.

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tell me let's talk about it.

How can I help you ifI don't know the truth.

– “Vaccines cause adults” (laughs) – I'll take all theimmunity got thanks Pam.

I would wear that shirt.

Vaccines cause adults.

You know what's funny? I could totally see an antivacs person seeing that being like, “oh my Godyou believe in that too” – “when a patient'sblood pressure is off.

” “So the attending asksyou to take you manually, ” “thinking it willsomehow be more accurate” (laughs) – It's so easy to check blood pressure.

You should know how to do it do not lose your art of the physical exam.

– “Do you need anotherstool sample doctor?” “I didn't even ask for the first one.

” – “Doctor: your wife is pregnant.

” “No, she isn't I was wearing a condom.

” “Yeah, but I wasn't.

” – Why all the things about doctors cheating with their patients wives.

I can't understand.

– “Ask yourself.

” “Is she actually thick?” “Or is she just sufferingfrom lumbar lordosis” – Whenever you say lordosis or kyphosis that's actually thecurvature of the spine.

And if you have extra kyphosis, or extra lordosis, it accentuates that curve.

– “Doctor: you're going to be a vegetable” “for the rest of your life.

” “Patient: I'm vegan so that's amazing.

” (laughs) – Speaking of vegan.

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I'm about to make a 30-day vegan video.

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Shhh.

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I can't believe I'm doing it.

I'm giving up the meats.

Vegetables, I'm coming for you.

Memes are great.

But have you seen my takeon YouTube challenges? Click here for that bad boy.

Stay happy and healthy.

(hip Hop music playing).

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